Change? Ha.

Just the mere 'idea' of this "3-year freeze on military pay" makes me sick.

My husband has 3 years left on his 5 year contract with the Marine Corps. Where would this 'idea' leave us, if it followed through and got past Senate and the House? It would leave us, as a military family, behind!!!

We scrap as it is! It's hard enough to live on the housing, food, and basic pay that we get now! And if it's frozen for 3 years!?!?! Hello! Yes, the economy needs to get better, but this is -NOT- the way you do it! You can't just freeze your military's pay!!! Their families would get left behind as the cost of living continues to go up. We don't live in the lap of luxury as it is, so it would only go down hill!

Besides...

Military doesn't get paid nearly enough for the jobs that they do. I mean, come on!!! They risk their lives for each and every American out there. They risk their lives and get paid next to nothing, while your favorite professional sports players, singers, and actors/actresses are all making enough to last them 10 lifetimes?

Also...

Another 'idea' to cut the government's deficit is to get rid of some of the Marine Corps aircraft. That sounds asinine to me. Plane asinine!!

My husband is not at all happy with this so called idea and neither am I. It doesn't make since and it is not fair to your nation to freeze pay and create more ciaos amongst the military members. It's not easy as it is, living this lifestyle, so go ahead, make it harder on us by making it even -more- difficult on us financially. Thank you. -sarcasm-.

It's not entirely the military's fault that the government is in such debt. They've always been in debt. So I guess in order to get them out of that debt, it's time to use us as pee-ons. Go figure.

Is this the change you were talking about, Mr. Obama? I hope you're happy, America.

Click here for the article that I read.

Starting Over

Starting from scratch is hard.

I once went from months of sitting in an empty apartment to having a dozen friends whom I loved very much. I was pretty close to all of them, but closer to a few.

Now that I'm in South Carolina I feel as if I have been cut off. Disconnected to my world of friends. I am back to sitting in an empty house with no one to talk to. It's not fun.

If you know what type of person I am, you know that I need people. I yearn for friendships and I hate being alone. I open myself up to people I barely know hoping for a friendship. Once a friendship is established I will and am a good friend. Well, as we all know, relationships can't be one-sided. I can't be a friend to myself...

I guess that's the culture of the military lifestyle. Starting from scratch. Jumping from place to place, only to figure out how to be a person again. Find friends. Find a life outside of my house and outside of my husband.

We all know we need girl time.

I have two years here, so let's hope I get out of this slump soon.

And we made it!!

....AND....

WE MADE IT!!!

MCAS Beaufort! :) I'm so excited that we are finally here. We went through California, Arizona, New Mexico, Texas, Oklahoma, Missouri, Illinois, Indiana, Kentucky, Ohio (stopped there for the weekend), West Virginia, Virginia, North Carolina, annnnndddd South Carolina! Woot!!!

:)

I'll have to blog on our move a little later...once we get a place and aren't in temporary lodging. :)

Finally! This is it!

Here it is!

The moment I've been waiting 1.5 years for! My husband is finally done with training! We finally get to be together somewhere that's somewhat stable! Yessssss! I am beyond happy!!!

I go pick him up at the airport within hours so I'm trying to find something to do to keep my mind busy, instead of watching the second hand tick by...tick..tick...tick.....

Woot!

My emotions are crazy whack, but I could pee my pants just thinking about the next 3 years together in South Carolina. I'm not, by all means, saying he won't get deployed. I'm just saying I get to be somewhere stable for a little bit and I'm sooooo excited!

Yay.

Ok. I had to blog about it. You know how it goes!

YAY!

My Time In Cali

So here it is, it's coming to an end. I've been in California since December 2009 and I'm leaving come Monday.

Let me tell you, I've definitely met some of the greatest people I know.

After my husband left in May 2010, I wasn't sure what I was going to do. I hadn't met many people nor grown close to anyone, but I knew I couldn't go back to Ohio due to financial reasons. All I could keep thinking is that I'd be staring at the four walls of our apartment for the next four months. I was a mess (to say the least).

Well, after the first couple weeks of me being home alone I received a phone call. It was Jamie. Jamie and I had met 2 weekends before my husband left California and we really didn't know one another. As we were talking she brought up the thought of me moving in with her, her husband, Greg, and their, then, 11 month old son, Emerson. After talking it over with the husband we concluded that it'd be a great idea.

It was the best idea ever. The last 4 months of my life out in California have been very enjoyable. I'm not sure what I'd do without Jamie and Greg. They've really taken me under their wing and I am forever grateful. They rescued me from nights of constant crying. I didn't realize I could make such great friends in such little time.

Emerson, their son has also been a saving grace to me. I love this kid so much. I've always liked kids, but Emerson is truly one of a kind that I've become really close to! I've seen him go from crawling to walking to running. He's even saying words now. Of course, among his words is "Jess"...ahhh! It's amazing how much he's grown and it'll tear me up to leave.

I know reading this you probably are thinking, wow, she didn't know these people, how did it go? Truthfully, me living here has been amazing. We haven't fought or argued about anything. Jamie is a stay at home mom and I am a stay at home wife. For us being around one another 24/7 you'd think we'd have fights...or something. We haven't. Not one. We've become extremely close and I love this family with my entire heart and I will definitely miss them.

Along with Jamie, I have met so many different Marine wives. It's amazing how much different we all are, but yet, so much alike. I have been so blessed to have so many friends out here. It's such a bittersweet circumstance. I am very happy to be able to be with my husband, but yet so sad to have to leave everyone that I have met here. Marine wives are like family to me. It's just the vicious cycle that we military families experience. You marry a Marine, leave your family for complete strangers (across the country) who then become your family, and you just leave again. It's definitely a one of a kind lifestyle that you'll never understand unless you live it.

So in writing this, I just wanted to show Jamie and Greg how appreciative I am of them. Without you guys I honestly don't know what I'd be doing. I'd probably be banging my head against the wall with tears running down my face. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I can never explain how grateful I am for you.

I love you and I will miss you more than you know.

Revolving Dollars

Urgh.

Stressed.

I hate this world so much. What do I hate about it? I hate MONEY. Money is what the world revolves around. Being in the military you'd think we'd be taken care of...well. Barely. Just barely.

We're having to make this move CROSS COUNTRY. We just got our last paycheck and we were supposed to get an "advance". Was it on there? No. Do we leave before the next paycheck? Yes. Do you see the issue here? We have NO MONEY to move. None. Just our out of pocket money. No advance in advance....

So. What do we do? Hmm. Husband went and asked admin about it and they said they haven't even processed it!! Uhm. Hello. We have ORDERS. Please. Get on the ball. Get it together. PLEASE.

I'm -hoping- we get this advance on next paycheck come the 15th, but we'll be on the road already and we'll already have the moving truck paid for. Yeah, we'll get reimbursed, or at least I'm hoping. Now. We're tight. Just struggling to pay the bills since we're having to pay for the truck.

I guess looking at the whole situation...-if- we had a credit card we could just put everything on there and pay it off once we get the money. Problem is, we don't have a credit card. I've learned that's what this nation revolves around...credit cards. Borrowing money to pay back later. Shriek.

Urgh.

Makes me sick. Literally.

The Big Day

So the big day is coming up! As in the big day I mean MOVING day. Ah.

I'm getting excited, but I'm also getting very nervous. We are renting through Penske and we are towing my car...yes, I said, "towing". That's where I start to get nervous. In order to "tow safely" we have to rent a 16' truck! We don't even have enough stuff to fill that thing! We didn't buy a whole lot of stuff because we knew this was coming and anticipated a move across country.

We anticipated right. The move from California to South Carolina with a SIXTEEN FOOT truck WHILE TOWING A CAR will be difficult. I'm stressed, to say the least.

The flip side? We are actually going to be able to stop in Missouri and Ohio along the way. My husband took a little over 2 weeks of leave! We get to stop in Missouri to see his sister (that's where she is going to college) and we are stopping by Ohio to get my bedroom furniture from my parents house, along with several other items (thanks, mom and dad!).

I'm just excited to be able to get back to a bit of "normalcy". I'm actually able to be with my husband!! The longest period of time that we have lived together is 5 months. Can it PLEASE be a little longer than that this time?! PLEASE!! :)

So excited.

So, if you see a Penske truck like the one pictured below, puling a trailer with a purple Cobalt, honk and waive!! That'll be us! HA! Look at that thing...oh man. STRESSED!!!

ORDERS!...Real ones.

We got orders!! and....they're REAL!

We are headed to....

Marine Corps Air Station, Beaufort, South Carolina!

It'll be bittersweet. We were wanting west coast so it'd be an easier move (and for other reasons), but now we're headed -back- across country to the east coast.

Of course, there will be pros and cons, but I'm getting more excited to go there each minute that goes by. I already have a good friend down there and I'm so excited to finally meet her! We should be moving within 3 weeks! How exciting...

:) SMILES!

Alright, just wanted to share. If anyone has any advice for the move let me know!!

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lashf;aioghakjsdh;fjghakjhgkjhfaklshgfhlahsfkagjsdhgljhagjhwaelf....whew.

That was a close one.

Can you say that I'm a bit frustrated? Oh, I mean, a bit -beyond- frustrated. But, it wouldn't be the military if I wasn't frustrated. Nothing is simple, nothing.

Orders. Uh-oh. I said the "O" word.

Okay. So we were given orders a couple weeks ago online to Yuma, Arizona for our permanent duty station. The only problem with that is that my husband won't be able to do his job there in Yuma. It's impossible. He'd have to switch aircraft or go somewhere else. This was all told to him by his instructor, who is the first person in his chain of command.

So, being that this was a couple weeks ago we knew they had to change something. Welp, his class was given final orders today, and guess what...

We are still going to Yuma. That's what he told me on his lunch break, so I poked and proded and told him he needed to make sure it wasn't a mistake because it would be really bad if we got there and he couldn't do his job. Then life would be a living you-know-what. He asked.

A couple hours later I get a frantic "I'm freaking out" text. Sgt says we can't be heading there. It's all impossible.

Hmm? Isn't that the -same- thing we just established two weeks ago?!?!

Next question. What are they going to do about it?

The only thing they can do is A) change his job or B) change his duty station. He wants them to change his job.

Who knows what will happen, but he was told he'd find out in the next couple of days. I'll give them til Wednesday.

I know it'll all work out, it's just frustrating to be yanked around. Everyone else knows in his class, why can't we know? Why do we always get shafted?!?! Only us.

Grrr....

If we're not stressed, someone isn't doing they're job right.

That is all! :)

Orders

Okay so we got our orders for our PDS. We're headed to MCAS Yuma, Arizona.

Or so we think.

There's not an F/A 18 squadron at Yuma. This creates a problem. It means that my husband won't be able to do his job.......

So, here we are, less than a month away and supposedly we're moving to Yuma, or are we? When will we know for sure? We have no idea.

The end.

Sigh.

Vent Session

Let me just vent...that's why I have this blog, right?!

Lately I've been having my days. You know, those days. I've been really missing my husband a ton. I know he's stateside, and frankly I'm pretty tired of being told I should be thankful that he's not deployed. What makes you think I'm not thankful? I mean, really, who wants their husband deployed? Not me. I'm simply saying that I miss him.

He's not an 8 hour drive from me, he's a 36 hour drive (straight through) from me. He's a plane ticket. I could go see him, that's what gets to me. I could see him if I just had the money. Which really gets to me, I moved away from my job back in my home state and now, with the economy, I haven't been able to find a job. My degree is pointless, I feel useless, and we all know military pay is not the highest paying job. Living on one income is pretty darn hard!

So, please, don't tell me to be thankful he's stateside, because I am. I never wish a deployment on anyone, ever. I do, however, believe that God choose these fighting men and women for a reason, just like He choose us spouses to support them back home for a reason. We are all a part of the few and the proud. Not too much longer 'til I'm reunited with my husband...less than a week 'til my visit! Thank goodness! :)

Day 12: Tickling my fancy all the way to NC

Alright, so I've done it. I've failed at updating my 30 day project! Argh. I'm sorry...AGAIN.

So today's day is another "tickle my fancy" day. So what other way to than to give everyone an update as to what's going on with my life!!

Evan is now in North Carolina for additional training...mmhm...go figure. I'm still stuck in California and thinking, what was that reason I didn't go back to Ohio to stay for a bit again? Because, if I were in Ohio it'd only be a 10 hour drive. Hmmpf. Go figure. Oh well. So, to get back on topic, Evan has very crappy cell phone service! It drives me up the wall! He finally was able to skype with me, but that was when he was in Florida, -on his very LAST day in Florida-. Go figure, again. So today, we spent like 87 hours trying to get skype to work again in NC, but it would freeze and be lagging or it'd just say, "screw you guys" and give up on us. Sigh.

My day did get better though!! I finally sat down and budgeted so tightly that I can now take a trip to see my husband!! I'm so stoked! I get to see him in a couple weeks and I couldn't be happier! My countdown has begun. Uh-oh...did she say countdown?!?! Mmhm. Which that leads me to my next topic...countdowns! Remember how I said I had -no- timeline for Evan's training to be over? Well, guess what? I do now! YAY! He'll be done in Septemeber. I better not post the exact date for OPSEC reasons, but yep, September! It couldn't get here sooner.

Oh, yeah, my birthday is Tuesday and my beloved sent me a basket of chocolates from the Rocky Mountain Chocolate Company! I have chocolate covered strawberries, pineapples, cherries, a carmel M&M apple, and some milk chocolates! I think he's trying to fatten me up! ;). Haha. No, my husband knows me better than anyone in the world!! I have the biggest sweet tooth on the planet! :)

Welp, now that you know I'm tickling my fancy all the way to North Carolina, I think my job here is done!! Hope all of you are doing well!!

A Packing Whirlwind

What a day it has been. I'm still packing numerous boxes and every so often I find an accessory of Evan's 8 million things to do with the Marine Corps. I've finally just got together everything and thrown it into a shoe box. You can tell I didn't organize that stuff! If I did organize it, he would have everything he needed in Pensacola. Hmm. Go figure.

I've also been feeling quite silly packing up things that are fragile. For instance, I packed up our glasses (cups) and I used our dish towels and plastic bags to protect them! Hopefully that works. Improvise, adapt, and overcome? Yeah I think so!!! hahaha.

Then, I get to the canisters on our kitchen counter and think, hmmm does brown sugar and/or flour go bad? I came to the conclusion that I didn't think so and just packed them away instead of throwing the contents away. Yes, this is me, I'm the keep-everything-it-might-come-in-handy-cheap-person! My husband gets so mad. It's like, Jess, it is only $2, throw it away and we'll get some later. Nah, babe, I'll just keep it! That $2 will add up some day!

On that same topic of keeping everything...I've kept most of the boxes we had from random stuff. For example, when we moved here, my father-in-law helped us move and had lots of things shipped to us. What did I do?! I kept almost all of the boxes! I even collapsed quite a few of them so we could store them easier! I also kept 80% of the boxes that things came in. For example, I have these boxes; tupperware, george foreman, pots and pans, glassware, printer, etc. It makes my husband so mad that I've kept almost every practical box known to man, but hey, I figure we'd be moving a lot, so why not!?! And guess who was right?! This girl! Mmmhmm...Those boxes are coming in handy now!!! Ohhh, burn! HA! Oh and another thing I made my husband do...I saw a big bin (the big plastic ones with a lid) near the dumpster one day and this is how the conversation went;

Me: "Hey, I think we could use that!"

Him: "Then you're digging it out of the dumpster."

Me: "Just pick it up and take it upstairs."

Him: "Okay, fine, but I'm done with it after that."

Me: "Wait, let me see what it looks like inside."

-opening it up-

Me: "Ew, that's gross."

Him: "Okay it's going back in the trash!"

Me: "No no no! You can clean it out!"

Him: "Okay fine".

-takes it upstairs and throws it in the extra bedroom-

Now, you see, he was SUPPOSED to clean it out. Guess who didn't clean it out?! Yeah, he left it for ME to clean out. Go figure. So now it's in our bathtub waiting on me to come clean it out. Too bad we don't have a hose. Grrr. Maybe I could give the cat a bath in it?!?! Ha! Just kidding!

Welp, I have a mess of an apartment to get back to. Gotta turn my music up loud and dance around singing, errr, I mean packing! Have a lovely day!

Getting Somewhere

Post it Note Tuesday; My First Post

Came across this idea from The Wifey through Supa Mommy. I love it, so here comes my first post!

Being a Marine Wife

While surfing blogs today I came across a blog that caught my attention. It's Married to a Sailor: The Journey of a Navy Wife. She is hosting a competition, and I'm all for competitions! So here we go, my assignment, write about what being a military/Marine wife is like for me...

What being a Marine wife is like for me;

It's a blessing in many ways, but can be very stressful. I wish I could sum it all up in one word, but I really can't. Although we have only been married for 7 months, I have felt like we've been married a million years. Throughout the entire time of his enlistment, I've grown, we've grown. This all means we have grown closer and our marriage can survive. With lots of couples they don't make that "long distance relationship" status. We don't have that problem, we know it will work. It's nice to know my husband is such a great guy and has so much courage. He is one of the few good men. Ha. I love that saying!

Though it can be a struggle when he's gone, it's an amazing feeling to see him again. It's like meeting him for the first time and sharing more memories in different places around the world. Traveling is awesome and I love to see different places and being able to spend that time with my husband in a new location is the best ever! When he is gone, I find myself checking my phone a million times a day, I keep it on loud wherever I go, just in case I do get a phone call.

It's a since of pride being the wife to a Marine. Seeing him in that uniform melts my heart. When I'm on his side and we're in public I beam with a smile and glow with pride. I would shout to the world that my husband is in the Marine Corps if I could. He's a true American Hero and he's one of a kind. Whenever I hear any kind of patriotic song, whether it's the Star Spangled Banner or America the Beautiful, I swell up with emotions. I even get teary eyed. Whenever I look at an American Flag I beam with pride. I have an extreme amount of pride for our amazing country. I even get chills when I see a Marine Corps billboard or see a commercial. That sexy voice that says "The Few, The Proud, The Marines" is the best sound ever.

I may travel all over the place throughout an enlistment term, but I get to meet new people. These people become my very best friends. They are a one-of-a-kind group. It's nice to have people that understand, and have been there, and walked in my shoes. However, military spouses know not to get too close, be able to leave those and continue to stay in contact with the amazing friends that you have met.

Being a military/Marine wife means that I won't see my family or friends from "home" as much as I like. It means I have to adapt, but it's good to get away from the friends that "pretend" to be your friend. You weed out the true friends to the fake ones.

It also means I have to be careful about when to plan for a family. We do not have kids right now. Although many great women have had children with their military husband, I'm not sure if it's the right thing for us just yet. I want children badly, but when he's set to deploy and we don't know what's next in his career, we aren't sure if we should have children just yet. It's a tough decision and we're unsettled on it right now.

On the financial end...oh man. It's nice to get those discounts and get nice tax returns. Or just go to the commissary and get tax free groceries, especially when you live in a bankrupt state with high sales tax. Oh, and the gas, on base, is always 10 cents cheaper then off. It's nice to be able to have the health care that we have, and all of those great benefits.

Although we will and have spent a lot of our relationship apart, it always tends to make our relationship stronger. Being a Marine wife means being tough and standing by his side no matter what. It's holding on to the memories for an amount of time and it means always having a countdown. I stand amongst the silent ranks, and I am a very proud Marine Wife.

Things are different this time

Well, Evan left for Pensacola today.

But, let me start off by saying I am very thankful that he is stateside. Do not confuse what I am about to say with me not being thankful, blessed, etc.

Things are different this time. I've said my fair shares of "see ya later"s, but this time it's different. A lot different. We've been married nearly a year now and been living together for 5 months, and never went a day without seeing one another. Our love has grown and changed from 'puppy love' to a more mature love.

Coming home to an empty apartment was an irking feeling. I just fell to my knees and bawled. Seeing his stuff, having his stuff, and knowing he was just here sunk my heart. I had no one to come home to. Bentley has tried his best to comfort me. He's laid in my lap and meowed at me, like asking, "what's wrong mommy?". He knows something's up.

My parents aren't right down the road. None of my family is, instead they're 2500 miles across country. My Marine Corps family is here, but I haven't gotten extremely close to them yet. While they've been so nice and welcoming, I just haven't opened up. I'm not much of an extrovert.

Some people would ask why would I stay out here in California instead of going "home" to Ohio? Well, let me tell you this. Ohio doesn't feel like my "home" anymore. My "home" is hear. I settled down with my husband for 5 months and this place feels more like "home" then Ohio ever will. At the same time, California doesn't feel like "home" to me either. It's like I have no home without my husband here. It's just me, Bentley, and our stuff.

I'm not going to lie, I'm so scared to be here by myself and I have so much going through my head. I know I have lots of friends, but ugh. I just want to scream.

I yearn to settle down more than anything and I loathe the fact that I have to move so much and I feel like I will never have a home. However, this just goes back to my last post. I married an amazing man, not because I wanted this military life, but because he is truly my soul mate. I love him so much and nothing will take that away.

As this change in my life comes and goes, I know I'll make it. I know I'm blessed that he is stateside, but it doesn't make things change. It doesn't make me miss him less or not wish things were different.

I don't really know how to put this "different" feeling into words, or how to express my feelings, I just know I'm feeling them. I miss him. I love him. Duty calls and duty sucks. This is why I stand among the silent ranks. I enlisted right by his side when I said "I do".

I can't help but cry. I'm not as strong as I wish I were. I'm not the perfect Marine Wife, but I think we all have our imperfections, and really? Who wants their husband away?

To make things worse, we still don't know the duration of the schools. Yes, schoolS. There will be an A school in Pensacola and a C school somewhere else. No idea where that "somewhere else" is.

Sorry that this is written in no particular order, I'm all over the place and so is this blog. But, for now, I will remain singing, "This is my temporary home", and remember that he is always here in heart, even not in person.

I love you, Evan.

PS- I've forgotten to mention this a million times, but BIG THANKS to the Wifey for creating my layout. Go visit her http://www.thewifeyblogs.com/ Thanks again!

Yep, that's the Marine Corps

So, a lot of you may be wondering what my latest status updates are about, well let me tell you about it.

Evan has been in the Marine Corps for over a year now. He's still in training status. Why? Ha! Well, let me start from the beginning. He signed a 5 year contract and picked a "Cryptological Linguestics" MOS for his job. That's all fine and good 'til you see how long that training is. It's a little over a year. He got here in May, started class in August, and if he would have been able to pass that dreaded language called, Pashto, he would have graduated from here (CA) in September and then would have went to Texas for additional training. Well, that isn't the case here. He was dropped from class in January for a "lack of ability", which -is- a common, very common, thing here.

So now, the fun part begins. The Marine Corps assigned him a new MOS last week while we were in Ohio visiting family. The only information they gave us was that it's in Pensacola, Fl and he has to be there by May 10th. We didn't have any other information other then that until we started researching. We found out that Pensacola is a Naval Air Station, so he'd be doing something in aviation, or maybe even intell. We had our fingers crossed for intell.

Well, just yesterday he was given his MOS title. It's Avionics Ordinance. Hmm. Researched it to find out that he'd be "loading bombs on to planes". Also we had to do some research to see just how long he'd be there. 30 days for the core class, not bad, right? Well, here comes the salt in the wound...He'd have to go to a secondary school after that, and we have no idea where or how long he'll be there. So, we are taking it step by step and trying to be optimistic about everything.

Then, we get to thinking. What is Jessica supposed to do? Well, good question. All of our stuff is in California, including our cat, my car, our couch, and just about ehhh everything. So, because I am not on his orders I have to stay here or fly back to Ohio. Ha. What would make the best since is for me to find a job and stay with Bentley (the cat) and have a car to drive around. So, that's what I have decided to do. There's just no way I'm going to drive my car back to Ohio with a cat BY MYSELF. No, not happening. I'm also not paying for a sedative to knock the cat out so I can fly to Ohio, just to get there to have no car and make poor Bentley and my cat back home fight.

Don't get me wrong, I'd love to come to Ohio and stay for the entire time Evan is gone, but it's just not logical in my mind. Besides, I don't want to bother anyone by having to borrow their vehicle, or stay at their house. I know I'd be more than welcome, but I don't like to depend on anyone. So for now, I am staying in the Golden State. I have a few friends out here that have promised to keep me occupied, so hopefully that will help.

I just feel like I can never win. I chase him to the west coast, just to see him go back to the east coast. Hopefully these next several months pass quickly.

Welcome to the life of a Marine Wife.